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To be resilient, focus on what you can control. In military survival school, you are taught that if you are a POW, focus on things you can control, even small things, even if it is only "tap codes" communicating with other POWs.
Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, The Bullet Proof Mind seminar (paraphrased)
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Bullet Proof Mind for the Armed Citizen Seminar
For PTSD, Shepherd Resource Group.